Kintsugi

When I was a little girl in one of our houses in Yakima, I remember jump-roping in the living room. My delight and play turned to chagrin when the rope looped around a porcelain figurine of bright red cardinals, a treasure my mom cherished because it reminded her of seeing those beautiful birds in Ohio. The look of horror, sorrow, and anger on her face still haunt me to this day. I didn’t mean to break anything, least of all this prize possession, but my intent didn’t matter when the damage was done. Unfortunately, there was no possibility for restoration with superglue or gold dust. I had to acknowledge that my carelessness hurt her and broke something irreplaceable. It’s a tough lesson to learn when you’re six. It continues to be a tough lesson no matter the age. Fortunately, my mom didn’t ever hold a grudge on that score. I just wasn’t allowed to jump rope inside the house anymore.

Kintsugi, the traditional Japanese technique and art for fixing broken pottery gives me a little bit of hope. (Go with me on this metaphor, pretty please.) In this tradition, pottery is mended with a lacquer dusted with powdered gold. The effect is extraordinary. The broken part is no longer something to be hidden or even grieved, but the repair turns the whole piece into something completely new and beautiful. Perhaps it is so when we work through hurt caused by careless words or actions. Maybe grace and joy, and most of all love, are the kintsugi gold to our hearts.