Bryan used to use West Marine Epoxy for all kinds of repair jobs. Mary and I chuckle about how he could fix just about anything with the stuff. No duct tape in this family, huh uh, we go for the big guns. Broken chair? No problem. Boat parts. Easy Peasy. Random busted thing? Got it.
Too bad broken hearts can’t be patched back together with a little of the stuff. Yesterday evening Mary and I went through family photos to prepare for Bryan’s service. I don’t want to speak for her or tell her side of the story, but I can say with 100% certainty being in the “lost my daddy club” is garbage. Absolutely devastating trash. Mine has been gone for four years. Hers has been gone for seven weeks. None of this is good or easy or fun. 0/10, do not recommend.
One of the most humbling things about being human for me is knowing there are certain things I cannot fix at all. I cannot heal someone else. I cannot repair a broken heart. I cannot make the sadness stop. We get tidbits of wisdom from random places and I heard this guy speak for a bit about how the difference between his 20 year-old self and his 50 year-old self is that he went from wanting to and believing he could fix everything to a mentality of working to make things better.
Maybe because we’re just so limited in our capabilities that’s the best we can hope for–to make it a little better. But on the other side of that, there’s tremendous grace and maybe even joy and freedom. If I relinquish the burden of fix it and hold fast to the notion of make it better, I can navigate life with more clarity of purpose and less anxiety.
Feryl Files 
Losing a parent is devastating. And as you’re going through your journey I imagine my own self on that journey and I ache for you. Fixed isn’t possible, no, but I really hope that better might be someday.
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Losing someone you love so very much SUCKS!!!!!
Negative Infinity/10.
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