100

Over three months ago I started a project I wanted to try for a long time. Concluding one job and beginning another, getting over being pretty sick, and trying to anchor the beginning of my day with something other than dread and doom-scrolling, I followed some advice about deliberately creating joyful experiences. My method, my medium has been watercolor paint and 4”x6” heavy, cotton paper each morning before breakfast with coffee mug nearby. Painting isn’t a new endeavor for me, but putting these restrictions, or what I prefer to think of as simplifications, gave me enough wind and sail to propel me.

So what did I paint? Abstracts, landscapes, bouquets, trees, produce, and single flowers. I learned that being a beginner is a wide open field of opportunity. Skill and technique really come with practice. I might have learned this lesson better as a ten year old practicing the piano, but I’m a stubborn git and prefer when it’s my idea and not imposed on me. Mom, Dad, just be glad I eventually got there.

I learned that I have a quiet place I can go in my heart and my head that shuts out the noise just for a bit. I learned that the colors you think are right and the colors that make it better are often outside the obvious. I learned that the paper is part of my palette, that water has a mind of its own, and the blow dryer is really handy when you’re running on a tight schedule.

I also re-learned something about myself that apparently I have trouble believing. I’ve got grit and stick-to-it-iveness. I can do the things I set out for myself to do.

If we’re lucky, we get to add 100 more days after this one. Whether we do something or not this time will pass. Why not be a beginner at something? Or why not get better at something you already do? What would you like to be better at? What are you willing to give 20-30 minutes of every day toward? Would you learn something new about yourself?

My (Not So) Secret Garden

When I was little, my Mama gave me some illustrated Frances Hodgson Burnett novels, namely A Little Princess and The Secret Garden. I love these stories for the resiliency and pluck of the main characters, but also for their hopefulness, even in solitude and loneliness. Maybe she was giving me a road map she knew I’d need. I’ve found healing in gardens and flowers. I know what it means to be in an untenable situation not of my choosing and how to both survive and thrive in spite of it. These are gifts that certainly endure.

More recently, I’ve been able to witness my cousin and her husband take a rough and abused house and grounds and convert them into the promise of something magical, much like the garden Mary Lennox discovers on her uncle’s property. Their sweat, tears, and laughter (and including a novice like me) ensure this will be a wondrous, welcoming place. In the process of watching the transformation of a wreck into a home, I’ve been inspired to do a small DIY project of my own. After Bryan passed, I moved my bedroom into what was once the office-catch-all-pantry-whatever room. One wall had a lot of patches and holes and needed some TLC. I knew I wanted to do something different, creative, floral, but it was just an idea until recently.

I went through all the steps. TSP wash, painters tape, priming the holes, patching the holes, cutting in the primer, rolling out the primer (a couple of times after a few minor setbacks and mishaps), cutting in the very dark, very dramatic color twice, rolling out twice, and then free-hand painting my own secret (but now that you know, not entirely secret) garden. I wanted something joyful to look at even on my darkest days, which there have been more than a few these past couple of months. This is a gift from me to me now and future me, too. I still have detail work and some leaves to round out the finish. I have a plug-in plate on order that will replace the cream-colored plastic one I got rid of. My sister encourages me to put a small writing desk in my bedroom. I just might do that.

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